One day every thing that can ever be written or thought (no matter how fucking stupid or ridiculous) will be written or thought. Only then will humanity be complete and we can all die in peace. This is my contribution.
Dear McFartnuggets: Everywhere I go someone’s got a Citi Bike. This is a bicycle that everyone in the whole city can use. You rent the bike, ride it around then put it back for someone else to use. Why is this so popular? I know it’s green, but it’s also pretty disgusting. Yeah let me […]
Read More Ask McFartnuggets: “Why Would You Ever Use a Bike Share Program?”When you step into a job interview it’s like stepping into a battle. You need to be armed (metaphorically) and prepared for whatever the interviewer is going to throw at you. A lot of interviewers like to launch a trick question at you just to throw you off your game and see how you adapt. […]
Read More Ten Trick Job Interview Questions And How To Avoid The Wrong AnswerDear McFartnuggets: I’m always hearing people talking about how humans are speciesist against animals like elephants and rhinos that we kill for sport. A lot of people love dogs and hate cats or vice versa and that makes them speciesist, but what about the animals? This isn’t just a one way street of hate. Bears, […]
Read More Ask McFartnuggets: “Why Are So Many Animals Speciesist Against Humans?”Whenever you’re going to ask a lady if she wants to go get a sundae at the local ice cream parlour, you get a little nervous. Sometimes you get so nervous you run away and all your friends laugh at you and say “You chickened out!” I chickened out, eh? So I was scared that […]
Read More Dumbass Sayings: “Chickened Out”Dear McFartnuggets: I heard that if you’re ever driving drunk and you get pulled over, you can take a handful of loose change and stuff your mouthful of pennies and the copper will help you pass the breathalyzer test. Is this a true thing or is it just an old wives tale? I want to […]
Read More Ask McFartnuggets: “Can Putting Pennies In Your Mouth Save You From A DUI?”Carrie Underwood has a song with a line in it that goes “You stole my happy, you made me cry.” I find it difficult to believe that someone who refers to their sense of contentment in life as their “happy” would ever lose it. They say ignorance is bliss and that has been provably true […]
Read More Dumbass Song Lyrics: “You Stole My Happy”Sometimes you’ll have a relative get into an accident which causes severe brain trauma and they’re put on life support. The doctor tells you that they have nearly none of their brain fuction left and won’t ever get it back. You ask people for advice on what to do and some jackass says “You should […]
Read More Dumbass Sayings: “No Brainer”Dear McFartnuggets: Have you ever noticed how gay some football terms sound? For a sport considered so manly you can’t watch a game without hearing the announcer say “Look at how the D just busted through coming right in the QBs face to get that sack!”, “The defensive end’s mouth was watering when he saw […]
Read More Ask McFartnuggets: “Why Are Football Terms So Gay?”Sometimes you see DVDs advertising a “bonus gag reel” then you buy the thing because you think you’re going to see Emma Stone giving blow jobs. Well aren’t you disappointed when you click the button in the menu and just shows a bunch of BLOOPERS. Yeah that’s right, “gag reel” is just another term for […]
Read More Dumbass Sayings: “Gag Reel”Dear McFartnuggets: Now that my daughter is almost a teenager I’ve been listening to a lot of current music to keep up with the kids so she’ll think I’m hip and rad. The one thing I’ve been finding myself thinking over and over again is what is wrong with the artists’ names these days? I […]
Read More Ask McFartnuggets: “Why Are Musicians Names So Weird These Days?”
McFartnuggets' Dune of Derangement 