One day every thing that can ever be written or thought (no matter how fucking stupid or ridiculous) will be written or thought. Only then will humanity be complete and we can all die in peace. This is my contribution.
Dear McFartnuggets: Why are all cats always jerks? I mean they go around acting like they’re better than you and they’re not very affectionate. They just have this sense of arrogance and it’s like they enjoy ignoring people. Then even if they do learn to love you a little, what do they do? They show you […]
Read More Ask McFartnuggets: “Why Are Cats Always Jerks?”Sometimes you hear a person say some shit like “I’m currently 20 years young!” or “I’m 18 years young!” Let’s get one thing straight, you can’t say “years young” to describe your age when you’re literally young. “Years young” is what old people say to make themselves feel better about quickly approaching their inevitable demise. […]
Read More Dumbass Sayings: “20 Years Young”Dear McFartnuggets: How come slutty Halloween costumes are so popular? Every costume has a slutty version like Slutty Raggedy Ann, Slutty Joker, Slutty Abraham Lincoln, Slutty Jesus. When does it end? Aren’t these sexist? Why do companies offer these costumes that objectify women? Why can’t people just dress like normal Halloween characters? Halloween costumes should […]
Read More Ask McFartnuggets: “Are Slutty Halloween Costumes Sexist?”Sometimes after a woman turns you down at the club she says “You wouldn’t even know what to do with me if you got me!” What kind of a thing is this to say to someone? Of course I know what I’d do… I’d tie you to a futon in my basement, strip naked, then […]
Read More Dumbass Sayings: “You Wouldn’t Know What to Do with Me If You Got Me”Dear McFartnuggets: Every year for Halloween I see so few people dressed up like Hitler. I don’t get it. If the idea is to be scary on Halloween why wouldn’t people pick one of the scariest monsters ever in human history? He killed way more people than Frankenstein or Dracula. Even to this day he […]
Read More Ask McFartnuggets: “Why Don’t More People Go As Hitler For Halloween?”If you’re currently in the hunt for a new job then you’re probably going to lots of job interviews. The process for choosing the right candidate is a complex one, but sometimes it boils down to the smallest details. If you’ve found yourself being passed up over and over again while doing everything perfectly there […]
Read More The Top 5 Small Things That Could Be Ruining Your Job InterviewDear McFartnuggets: I’ve been applying to a ton of jobs lately and so I’ve been entering job applications online several at a time to improve my chances. Last night I was a little drunk and my finger slipped when I was attaching my resume and instead I accidentally clicked the wrong file in my computer […]
Read More Ask McFartnuggets: “I Accidentally Sent The Wrong File With a Job Application What Do I Do?”Sometimes on commercials for tv shows they advertise “Stories ripped from the headlines!” Apparently these days not being able to come up with original concepts is something to be proud of. Are television writers so devoid of new ideas that they’re now bragging about how they just reboot things that occurred in real life? That’s […]
Read More Dumbass Sayings: “Ripped From The Headlines”Dear McFartnuggets: I’m trying to graduate from college soon and all I hear from people on campus is “Oh I’m make the sumo cum loud!” or “I gotta get magnum cum loud!” What on earth are these people talking about? You’re trying to make a sumo wrestler cum loudly? That’s gross. Whether you use a […]
Read More Ask McFartnuggets: “What’s The Difference Between Summa Cum Laude and Magnum Cum Laude?”For some reason the politically correct term for anyone who isn’t White is considered a “person of color.” Even Hispanics, Asians, and Albino African American people who physically have the same skin color as average White people fall under the classification of “people of color.” Obviously that makes no sense. It’s not like people’s ethnicity […]
Read More Dumbass Sayings: “Person of Color”
McFartnuggets' Dune of Derangement 