One day every thing that can ever be written or thought (no matter how fucking stupid or ridiculous) will be written or thought. Only then will humanity be complete and we can all die in peace. This is my contribution.
Whenever someone dies and they have living parents people always say “No parent should ever have to bury their child!” Because of course the first thing someone wants to hear when their child dies is a “Lord of the Rings” quote. No one should ever have to bury ANYONE, but it happens. What is someone […]
Read More Dumbass Sayings: “No Parent Should Ever Have to Bury Their Child”Dear McFartnuggets: The 5-Second Rule says that you can drop food on the floor and if you pick it up within 5 seconds it’s totally fine and there’s no damage done. I was wondering does the same thing apply to babies? If I dropped a baby on the floor and picked it up a second […]
Read More Ask McFartnuggets: “Does The 5-Second Rule Apply to Babies?”Sometimes you visit your grandparents and the only person home is your grandpa. You ask him where grandma is and he says “I sent that bitch packing. It’s over.” I never understood this saying “Sent packing” All that means is you sent someone away to pack their bags. That doesn’t necessarily mean they left. You […]
Read More Dumbass Sayings: “Sent Packing”Dear McFartnuggets: What if men had periods like women? Could you imagine what the world would be like? Wouldn’t it be crazy! They would probably have “manpons” and try to act all cool about it. I wonder how they would deal with the cramps and mood swings. Isn’t that a funny idea!” — Nia from Frankfort, […]
Read More Ask McFartnuggets: “What if Men Had Periods?”Sometimes when you’re at a funeral for a guy died in a wood chipper and you say “This is really tearing me up” someone says “Too soon!” What people are saying is that the joke is too soon, but in time it will be acceptable or at least less inappropriate. How is that exactly? Why […]
Read More Dumbass Sayings: “Too Soon”Dear McFartnuggets: Whenever you see a person who succeeds like a sports star sinking a game winning shot or Tiger Woods getting the golf ball in the hole they always do a fist pump. What the heck is that? I don’t even know how to describe what it is. It’s like they’re jerking off an […]
Read More Ask McFartnuggets: “Why Do People Do a Fist Pump When They’re Excited?”Sometimes when you’re negotiating prices with an actress to get her to be in your “home movie” she says “Money talks, bullshit walks!” Now this saying might make sense if there wasn’t a saying that goes “Talk is cheap.” So if money talks, how can talk be cheap? Now you might say this means talk […]
Read More Dumbass Sayings: “Money Talks, Bullshit Walks”When you’re talking to someone in a wheelchair eventually you forget they’re even in the wheelchair. When you forget sometimes that can lead to some awkward situations when you use an expression that is insensitive to wheelchaired individuals. It’s good to treat them like anyone else, but you have to be somewhat aware of what […]
Read More 10 Popular Expressions To Avoid When Talking To Someone in a WheelchairDear McFartnuggets: Help me! I think I have two vaginas? Is this even possible? — Moira from Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania Dear Moira: How do you THINK you have two vaginas? But to answer your question, yes it is possible. The condition is known as Uterus didelphys. It results from the failure of the Paramesonephric ducts to […]
Read More Ask McFartnuggets: “I Think I Have Two Vaginas?”The author Steve Maraboli is credited with quote “The volume of your voice does not increase the validity of your argument.” This is true when dealing in realistic terms, but not always. For example if someone said something with the voice of god booming throughout the entire world, I think a lot of people would […]
Read More Dumbass Sayings: “The Volume of Your Voice Does Not Increase The Validity of Your Argument”
McFartnuggets' Dune of Derangement 