One day every thing that can ever be written or thought (no matter how fucking stupid or ridiculous) will be written or thought. Only then will humanity be complete and we can all die in peace. This is my contribution.
Dear McFartnuggets: Do you think we will ever see an Avengers vs Justice League movie? People say that the egos involved with DC and Marvel are too big to ever agree and settle on a deal to make it happen, but could you imagine how great it would be! It’s the dream matchup everyone wants […]
Read More Ask McFartnuggets: “Do You Think There Will Ever Be An Avengers vs Justice League Movie?”In the Ed Sheeran song “Thinking Out Loud” he says “Darling I will be loving you ‘til we’re 70.” What an odd thing to say considering human life expectancy is well above 70 these days. 70 is basically the new 50. Would people find it as heartwarming if he was saying “Darling I will be […]
Read More Dumbass Song Lyrics: “I Will Be Loving You Til We’re 70”Sometimes a person will give you a compliment and then follow that with “I mean it. I’m not just blowing smoke up your ass!” What they probably don’t know is that people used to really blow smoke up people’s asses. Tobacco enemas used to be a way to test to see if someone was actually […]
Read More Dumbass Sayings: “Blowing Smoke Up Your Ass”Dear McFartnuggets: My grandmother has told us that she wants the family to have her taxidermied so she can be with us all the time. Some people in town who have heard about this say it’s wrong and they’re trying to keep it from happening. They say it’s illegal but I don’t understand what’s so […]
Read More Ask McFartnuggets: “Is it Wrong to Taxidermy Humans?”When you repeatedly put your tongue in a below-the-equator orifice for pleasurable purposes they call that “eating someone out.” I think this is a horribly mislabeled term. First of all, who “eats” like that? Maybe if you’re in a pie eating contest that’s acceptable table manners, but in any other situation it’s best to have […]
Read More Dumbass Sayings: “Eating Out”Dear McFartnuggets: I hear people always going on and on about how badly we are treating Mother Nature, but hey wait a minute doesn’t she gets Earth Day PLUS Mother’s Day? How many more holidays do we want to give this bitch? — Kobbs from Tuscaloosa, Alabama Dear Kobbs: Well that might be fine if […]
Read More Ask McFartnuggets: “Are We Really Treating Mother Nature That Badly?”Dear McFartnuggets: People are always talking about going to Heaven when they die and how great Heaven will be well how are we so certain that this world isn’t Heaven? Huh? Think about it! There’s so much beauty in this world. What if THIS is already Heaven? Couldn’t it be possible? Why can’t people imagine […]
Read More Ask McFartnuggets: “What if This World is Really Heaven?”Sometimes when you do your new risque dance routine in front of family and friends before you hit the “America’s Got Talent” stage, your mother says “My word! It’s a good thing nana isn’t around to see this! She’s probably spinning in her grave right now!” People mean this to show dissatisfaction of a thing, […]
Read More Dumbass Sayings: “Spinning in His/Her Grave”The British artist Jonathan Ellery is credited with saying “Be fearful of mediocrity.” Well, if mediocrity is something to fear then that means it deserves a little more credit than you’re giving it. If mediocrity means “pedestrian” or “inferior” then you should have no reason to be fearful of it at all. By fearing mediocrity […]
Read More Dumbass Sayings: “Be Fearful of Mediocrity”This was the commercial that really got people to be suspicious of “hot dog clowns” as they were called. The clowns used the hot dogs and mustard to get closer to children and develop a trusting bond. Many say it was the clowns’ description of “lively” spices noting it was the complete opposite of deadly […]
Read More Arguably The Creepiest Clown Mustard Commercial Ever
McFartnuggets' Dune of Derangement 