One day every thing that can ever be written or thought (no matter how fucking stupid or ridiculous) will be written or thought. Only then will humanity be complete and we can all die in peace. This is my contribution.
Is that a manual transmissionor are you just happy to see me? Dear McFartnuggets: Let’s say in the near future I buy a crappy used car somewhere and bring it home and it starts repairing itself and talking to me. I find out it’s a Transformer and it’s going to be my new best friend […]
Read More Ask McFartnuggets: “Is a Transformer’s Stick Shift its Genitals?”One phrase that keeps showing up in life is “Whole nother level.” Occasionally you’ll hear someone say something like “Yeah I gotta take my love life to a WHOLE NOTHER LEVEL and with this squirting vibrator I’m finally gonna be able to do that.” Okay let’s try to sort through this phrase. “Nother” is supposed […]
Read More Dumbass Saying: “Whole Nother Level”Are you addicted to pawn? By now you’ve probably seen an episode of one of the many pawn shop reality shows on TV with titles that play off the fact that “Pawn” sounds kind of like “Porn.” There’s “Pawn Stars”, “Hardcore Pawn”, “Beverly Hills Pawn” (which doesn’t even bother trying to make a real pun), […]
Read More The Top 5 “Pawn” Related Reality Shows That Will Probably Come Out SoonSpanish and English mayone day merge intoa single language. Dear McFartnuggets: You know how people who speak Spanish say “Nueva York” instead of “New York”? Why do they do that sometimes but then say other full words in English like “Bootylicious”? I only ask because I saw a Subway sandwich commercial in Spanish where the […]
Read More Ask McFartnuggets: Why Do People Who Speak Spanish Say English Words?Sometimes when you’re talking to someone and you say something weird like “I like the way your face smells” they say “What’s wrong with you? Are you autistic or something?” Maybe I am! MAYBE I AM! What if I was? What then? Are you really trying to mock someone for having a neurological issue? That […]
Read More Dumbass Sayings: “What’s Wrong With You? Are You Autistic?!”This dude has a prettydecent technique. Dear McFartnuggets: I like looking at women’s boobs when I talk to them except it’s hard to do that because they’re right in front of the woman so she can always see when I’m looking. I don’t want to be disrespectful to the woman’s face or brain, but at […]
Read More Ask McFartnuggets: “How Can I Look at a Woman’s Boobs Without Her Seeing?”The Purge can be a bummerbut you have to rememberit’s a necessary evil. As we all know, “The Purge” is the one day during the year when the American government makes all crime legal for 12 continuous hours. It’s the one day a year the rest of the country gets to act like it’s Chicago. […]
Read More The Top 5 Worst Things To Do During The PurgeI bet The Iron Horsenever saw this happening. Dear McFartnuggets: Have you heard of this “Ice bucket challenge” business? People are making videos online showing themselves dumping a bucket of ice water on themselves to raise awareness for ALS or Lou Gehrig’s Disease. The thing is, if they DON’T participate they have to donate $100 […]
Read More Ask McFartnuggets: “What is the Deal with the Ice Bucket Challenge?”The truth may hurt, but it hurts a lot less than lies. Dear McFartnuggets: I can’t believe the police involved in the investigation of Robin Williams’ suicide gave away so much information to the public and the media. I was outraged to hear the gory details about the death of this amazing actor and legend. Why […]
Read More Ask McFartnuggets: “Why Did the Public Need to Know Details of Robin Williams’ Suicide?”Sometimes when you see someone early on in the day they’ll say “Morning!” For some reason people think they need to abbreviate “Good morning” to just “Morning.” Is it too much trouble to say the word “Good”? It’s a pretty damn short word. If the saying was “Fantastic morning!” Then I would understand shortening it, […]
Read More Dumbass Sayings: “Morning”
McFartnuggets' Dune of Derangement 