One day every thing that can ever be written or thought (no matter how fucking stupid or ridiculous) will be written or thought. Only then will humanity be complete and we can all die in peace. This is my contribution.
Dogs get a lot ofprivileges that we don’t. When you encounter a stranger walking their dog, sometimes the dog will run up to you and engage. When this happens the dog pretty much has the freedom to do anything they want short of urinating on you. Dogs don’t have to worry about what society says […]
Read More The Top 5 Things Dogs Are Allowed to Do to People, But People Aren’t Allowed to Do to DogsI didn’t think I could make itthrough today, but guess what! Henry Ford once said “Whether you think you can or you think you can’t, you’re right.” That’s a nice inspiring quote, but of course it’s complete bullshit. The fact of the matter is, what you think is irrelevant in most cases. A guy who […]
Read More Dumbass Sayings: “Whether You Think You Can or You Think You Can’t, You’re Right!”The world’s greatest disguise. Superman is one of the most polarizing superheroes ever created. One of the major flaws in his story is how no one in Metropolis can figure out that he’s Clark Kent. Some people argue that Clark Kent’s glasses are the perfect disguise because Superman obviously doesn’t need glasses. That’s a decent […]
Read More The Top 5 Biggest Clues That Clark Kent is SupermanEither you’re hungryor you’re not. In America we call Hors d’oeuvres “Appetizers”, but that name doesn’t really seem to make sense. Hors d’oeuvres are small foods served during a dinner to hold people over until the main course arrives. “Appetizer” implies the food is there to stimulate the urge to eat. Who the hell goes […]
Read More Dumbass Sayings: “Appetizers”Unless you look like thisyou can’t go medievalon anyone’s ass. Occasionally you’ll get into a social dispute at a local alcoholic beverage dispensary establishment and some guy will say “Hey man, nobody motorboats my wife’s titties except me! I’m gonna go Medieval on your ass!” Excuse me? You’re going to go “Medieval on my ASS?” […]
Read More Dumbass Sayings: “Go Medieval On Your Ass”Batman loves takinselfies. One of the biggest questions that gets asked about Batman is “How the hell do the people of Gotham City not know he’s really Bruce Wayne?” You have to suspend your disbelief in order to enjoy the comic books and movies, but sometimes the evidence can be so obvious that it’s almost […]
Read More The Top 5 Biggest Clues That Bruce Wayne is BatmanHere are some commercials that shocked us and disturbed us throughout the years so much so that they had to be banned. The first was a commercial for Bell who had the creepy slogan “Reach out and touch someone.” Next there’s a commercial featuring a lady whose inability to find an elevator caused a man […]
Read More Disturbing Banned Commercials For Telephones, Pain Killers, And VitaminsWhen you die on yourfront sometimes people think you’re planking. Dear McFartnuggets: I looked in the back of my pantry today and found dozens of dead cockroaches laying on their backs. Every cockroach I ever seen dies on its back. Why do cockroaches always die like this? — Rodney from Tuscaloosa, Alabama Dear Rodney: The scientific […]
Read More Ask McFartnuggets: “Why Do Cockroaches Always Die on Their Backs?When someone says you’remore than a woman. This iswhat they mean. The Bee Gees sang a song called “More Than A Woman” where they sing to a woman who is “More than a woman.” What does that mean exactly? Shouldn’t being a woman be good enough? No one would ever call a man “More than […]
Read More Dumbass Sayings: “More Than A Woman”Of course one negativeis looking like this. Sometimes you start to lose control of your life and the last thing on your mind is getting a haircut. When that happens, you tend to lose track of time. Months pass, years pass, until one day you wake up and realize your hair is down below your […]
Read More The Top 5 Negatives To Having Long Hair
McFartnuggets' Dune of Derangement 