One day every thing that can ever be written or thought (no matter how fucking stupid or ridiculous) will be written or thought. Only then will humanity be complete and we can all die in peace. This is my contribution.
When you see a hobo putting a personal enjoyment item down his throat on the bus everyone tells the cops “He was deepthroating it!” How is this a term that people use? Deep throat? Who doesn’t have a deep throat? All throats are inherently deep, that’s the whole point of throats. That’s how food and […]
Read More Dumbass Sayings: “Deep Throat”Some songs just aren’tsuited for the hood. When you’re driving through the ghetto where you grew up you always have the urge to blast music really loud in your car so everyone else can hear it too. Usually that’s fine if it’s Tupac or Biggie, but there are some songs you don’t want other people […]
Read More The Top 5 Worst Songs To Blast In Your Car While Driving Through The GhettoIsn’t it about that time? People have been forecasting the end of humanity for generations. Their failure to guess right might give you some comfort, but remember that the end of the world is inevitable. As we move along the timeline the odds of someone guessing correctly only increase. Taking comfort in past failures to […]
Read More 3 Subtle Signs That Human Civilization Will End Sooner Than LaterWhen you’re in a street fight with someone much larger than you, your survival instincts kick in. This will sometimes cause you to attack the other person’s genitals. When you’re punching away on a man’s sack usually someone in the crowd will yell “Nut shots are for pussies!” Well if I’m the pussy why is […]
Read More Dumbass Sayings: “Nut Shots Are For Pussies”When your Uncle Rick shows up to Thanksgiving high off his ass on heroin everyone says “Uncle Rick fell off the wagon!” This is supposed to mean that he’s back on drugs, but it’s a little confusing. If doing drugs is falling off the wagon then that means whenever you’re not doing drugs you’re technically […]
Read More Dumbass Sayings: “Off The Wagon”He’s a dead legend,not a fountain. Dear McFartnuggets: People toss pennies on Benjamin Franklin’s grave for good luck, but why do they choose pennies? Abraham Lincoln is on the penny, you dummies! Who the hell is you to toss pennies on a mafucka’s corpse for good luck? That’s some selfish bullshit right there! You gonna […]
Read More Ask McFartnuggets: “Why Do People Toss Pennies on the Grave of Benjamin Franklin?”Disney’s using a famousprostitute motto. There’s a song from the Disney film “Frozen” called “Love is an Open Door” and it’s sending the wrong message to kids out there. Love is NOT an open door. You need to keep the door of love closed and look out the peephole before you let anyone in. You […]
Read More Dumbass Sayings: “Love is an Open Door”“What’s your problem,ossifer?!” There’s nothing quite like the feeling you get when you’re speeding down the freeway and you see that highway patrol siren go off in your rear view mirror. When that happens you have to fight every urge to floor it and get into a high speed chase and you have to turn […]
Read More The Top 5 WORST Ways To Get Out of a TicketWhen your mother leaves you outside the house to sleep on the lawn during a lightning storm they call that “tough love.” Let me tell you something, there is no such thing as tough love. Tough love is just something people say when they’re doing awful things to people they’re supposed to be caring for. […]
Read More Dumbass Sayings: “Tough Love”Basically, don’t doanything dogs do. Dear McFartnuggets: Sometimes for fun when I’m bored I like to bark at my dog. I don’t think he likes it though, he always looks confused and runs away from me. How come is that? Why does this happen to me? — Marilou from Baltimore, Maryland Dear Marilou: Dogs don’t […]
Read More Ask McFartnuggets: “Why Does My Dog Hate When I Bark at Him?”
McFartnuggets' Dune of Derangement 