One day every thing that can ever be written or thought (no matter how fucking stupid or ridiculous) will be written or thought. Only then will humanity be complete and we can all die in peace. This is my contribution.
Since when is being crazyconsidered good? As many of you know.the current slogan for Pop Tarts is “Crazy good.” What a horrible slogan that is. First off, Pop tarts are good, but that’s about as far as I would go in describing them. I would not add the adjective crazy to describe a toaster pastry. […]
Read More Dumbass Sayings: "Crazy Good"Maybe if fewer people went with their gut, obesity wouldn’t be such a huge problem in America. A lot of people these days like to “Go with their gut” when making decisions. Going with your gut means making a decision based on your instincts usually with disregard to logic and facts. These decisions don’t come from […]
Read More Dumbass Sayings: "Go With Your Gut"Just say you were havingback problems. Dear McFartnuggets: While my mom was out getting groceries I decided to go into her room and try on a few things. Of course she had to come back to get her purse and opened the door to see me trying on her bra. Now she’s not talking to […]
Read More Ask McFartnuggets: "My Mom Caught Me Wearing Her Bra"Whenever you want to verbally berate someone in a higher position of power all you have to say is “With all due respect” beforehand. That lets the person know that you respect them for their job or social status, but not in any other way. Someone people think they can say “With all due respect, […]
Read More Dumbass Sayings: "With All Due Respect"Did this make you yawn?If not then you might be aserial killer. Boredom is an unfortunate yet crucial part of life. Without boredom we would never truly be able to appreciate excitement. Despite boredom’s key role in our lives, it’s still not very pleasurable and so we do things to make it bearable. Sometimes we […]
Read More The Top 5 Worst Ways To Pass Time When You’re BoredFree Hugs are a thousand times morepopular than Free Kisses. Dear McFartnuggets: I was walking home from a party a few months ago when a guy ran up to me and kissed me on the mouth and ran away. A few days later I noticed blisters on my mouth, had it checked out and it […]
Read More Ask McFartnuggets: "Can I Sue Someone For Kissing Me And Giving Me Herpes?"If you keep flushing peethis is what the world will look like. In an effort to conserve water, many people employ the motto “If it’s yellow let it mellow. If it’s brown flush it down.” This essentially means only flush the toilet when you’ve taken a dump. The only real problem with this saying is […]
Read More Dumbass Sayings: "If It’s Yellow, Let It Mellow. If It’s Brown, Flush It Down"Or you could hand them a coupon for free deodorant while pinching your nose shut. Dear McFartnuggets: I’m currently a college student at Seton Hall and I have a political science class where the professor has assigned seats. This guy who sits next to me smells like a thousand year old potato sack full of dead […]
Read More Ask McFartnuggets: "How Do I Politely Tell Someone They Smell Terrible?"Smart people breathe onlythrough their nostrils. For whatever reason, “Mouthbreather” has become a synonym for “stupid person”. The thing that doesn’t make sense about this phrase is that everyone breathes through their mouth. If you spend your whole life breathing through your nose then you’re the one with the problem here. “Mouthbreathing” may have a […]
Read More Dumbass Sayings: “Mouthbreather”May have to add Mummy Baby tothis list in the future. In virtually every scenario or setting besides intercourse, having a boner is inappropriate and uncalled for. If you find yourself in a situation where you need to stop getting a stiffy it’s important to have a mental library of really unarousing things to imagine […]
Read More The Top 5 Best Mental Images To Help You Stop Getting A Woody
McFartnuggets' Dune of Derangement 