Ask McFartnuggets: “Is Sentencing Someone To Life in Jail Really Morally Better Than The Death Penalty?”

Dear McFartnuggets: I hear that people are saying we can’t use the death penalty because it’s immoral and wrong. Instead people want criminals to spend their life in jail as an alternative, even though some people say life in jail is a worse punishment than death. I think it can be. So if life in jail […]

Dumbass Sayings: “Everyone Gets Knocked Down, What Matters is How Quick You Get Back Up”

Football coaches love saying “Everyone gets knocked down, what matters is how quick you get back up!” It sounds inspirational and it’s sometimes true, but it’s not the right message to be sending to football players, children, or anyone really. If you get knocked down due to a severe blow to the head, most people […]

Ask McFartnuggets: “If Bees Go Extinct Can’t We Just Use Hummingbirds To Pollinate Stuff?”

Dear McFartnuggets: I always hear people going on and on about how we can’t let the bees go extinct. If we let the bees go extinct then we’ll all die because the bees pollinate the flowers and if that doesn’t happen then there will be a chain reaction and every species on earth will die! […]

The Top 5 Best Ways To Reuse Old Maxi Pads

The social media movement #RecycleYourUsedPeriodPads is gaining a lot of traction these days as people are becoming more environmentally conscious about their maxi pads. Women are beginning to realize that you can’t just throw this stuff in the trash. There are lots of different, inventive uses for old maxi pads (once they’ve been washed off) […]

Ask McFartnuggets: “Why Do Fans Yell “Charge!” at Baseball Games?”

Dear McFartnuggets: Why at a baseball game do they always do that “Doo doo doo doooo dooo DOOOOO CHARGE!” bullshit? How you gonna tell the players to charge in a sport where there’s no form of charging involved whatsoever? At least in football players charge as a team on kickoffs. You never hear that chant […]

Dumbass Sayings: “Sweating Like a Pig”

Sometimes when a coworker will show you their homemade porn on their phone they say “Look at that, I was really sweating like a pig!” Sweating like a pig? What the hell are you talking about? I’ve got some news for ya pal, pigs don’t really sweat. They do have some sweat glands, but when […]

Ask McFartnuggets: “Why Isn’t Women’s Basketball More Popular?”

Dear McFartnuggets: How come women’s basketball isn’t more popular in America? When it comes time for March Madness the only people in my office that fill out of a women’s tourney bracket are me and Gerald the creepy janitor. He always beats me too because he says he watches all the college girls really closely. […]

The Top 5 Reasons “Mrs. Doubtfire” Would Never Work in Real Life

We all know “Mrs. Doubtfire” is one of the greatest movies ever made, but after you’ve watched it for the 500th time you start to notice minor flaws. The reason the movie is so good is because the flaws don’t really detract from the viewing experience. Still, it’s interesting to think about what would happen […]

Dumbass Sayings: “I Was Like…”

Whenever people are telling you a story they always say “I was like ‘Get this baby off me before I throw it off!” Oh really? Is that what you were like? Or is that what exactly happened? The problem I have with this phrase is it should only be used when you’re paraphrasing. If you […]

Previously Unaired Commercial ft.The Most Insane Woman Who Ever Lived

If you’ve ever wondered if it was possible to enjoy cereal too much, this commercial proves the answer is yes. I’m not sure where they found this lady or what happened to her and her plot to destroy the Earth. Maybe the aliens took her back and let her retire with all her space coins. […]

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